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Wednesday, 18 August 2021

Naomi Olympic Recount Writing (Wednesday T3, W4)

 

The Vollyball event Olympics game!
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2 comments:

  1. Mr Hughes18 August 2021 at 13:14

    I love this Naomi, well done! I can definitely imagine you making it to the Olympics one day. I would love to be able to cheer on my students to a Gold Medal!
    One thing to work on for next time - some more descriptive language would help make your story more intense, and exciting, like using spike, or smash to describe hitting the ball.
    Keep up the great work

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    1. Naomi18 August 2021 at 14:22

      Thank Mr Hughes for telling me! I did change some of the words to smash <3 Take another look at it if you can!

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